School...

So yesterday I had placement testing for me to go back to college.  I was kind nervous before I left, but then as soon as I sat down at that computer..My chest tightened up and suddenly it felt like I could not take a deep breath.  I tried to calm myself down to no avail.. And of coarse I did not have my inhaler or my anxiety meds with me. sigh.. I'm surprised I made it home.... had to call my hubby and have him talk me calmer, and even called my therapist it was horrible.. Even when I got home to a yummy dinner made by my loving husband.. I still could not calm down.  It took until about midnight for me to finally feel normal again... I don't know whats wrong with me.  I get so nervous about stuff since Moon died.  Its like losing her rocked my world so badly that the foundation is crumbling.  I still have my faith and thats keep me going for most of everything but now I just cant process any other stressers.. I'd almost be happier not going anywhere at all.  And I hate that..Not that we have a lot of friends anyways not many people want to be friends with a sex offender.  Doesn't even matter if they have known you for years, they go on line and read his profile and get all mad and wont listen to the full story or accept that he has changed.  They all say well if he changed why didn't he get his level lowered.. and the answer to that is because he didn't know how to do it and never had the money to go back to court for that to happen.  Its not easy to get a level lowered, you cant even have a speeding ticket in 2 or 3 yrs before asking to be re-evaluated. oh well thats all for me today. sorry so short.. til then